School is For Suckers

Let me start off by saying I am not a bad student. I am just different... or at least now I am.

The school system is a completely fucked up and twisted institution, not to mention a compulsory one in most countries.

Is it if my fault I feel that school is a complete and utter waste of my time? Because I have more than enough evidence and events to back up why I feel this way.

This is what a normal day of school is for me.

I go to school at around 8 am. People who are late will have an hour of detention where they literally sit there and do nothing but stare blankly into the ceiling.

Class begins and the teacher, who in different cases, may or may not have a lesson plan.

Teachers who do have a lesson plan, usually teach by the book and have specific state guidelines, which does not allow for much flexibility and freedom to go beyond the material being taught.

Sometimes teachers who don't have a lesson plan at all will just pull something out of their ass and play a movie "related to the material." After all they do get paid regardless of what students are taught. I've had a teacher who just watched the Lost series for an entire month. And parents wonder why their students say they learn NOTHING.

I can't even tell if the material I am learning is fake or real. Sometimes teachers have never learned the material fully themselves, let alone have the ability to teach it.

We think of teachers as some sort of genius in their own profession, well that's college.
But in high school, teachers are a joke, classes are a joke, and school itself is a joke.

There's so much to say on why school is a terribly designed infrastructure, but for now I'll end it here by saying the 8 hours I spend learning in school could easily be learned if I had just 3-4 hours to my own learning the same material and quite possibly more.

Nobody Understands You, But You

Nobody understands you, but yourself. Not even your parents, friends, or closest loved ones could ever possible understand you as fully as you do yourself.
 I hate being criticized. But it is inevitable. Criticism blinds us from understanding people fully, even if their viewpoints different greatly from ours.

Today we criticize just about everything, from the food we eat, to the clothes people wear, to even our own parent's and how they behave. Maybe it's because we don't understand things beyond what our eyes can see.

This is what I mean:

R.I.P to That girl you called a slut in class today. She’s a virgin. The pregnant girl walking down the street. She got raped. The boy you called lame . He has to work every night to support his family. That girl you pushed down the other day. She’s already being abused at home. That girl you called fat. She’s starving herself. The old man you made fun of cause ugly scars. He fought for our country. The boy you made fun of for crying. His mother is dying. You think you know them . Guess what? You don’t!

We live in a world where even our own parent's judge us based off the most stupid of things. From grades, proper behavior, actions, thoughts, inaction, just about every little fucking thing can be used as some form of judgement and frankly I'm done with it.

If even the woman who gave me birth can't treat me as her son of a bitch, than who do I turn to for love and forgiveness?

But it's not their fault. They don't understand me the way I understand myself. And most likely... they never will. For the remainder of my life, I will just have to sit back and hear them scream insults and throw apathetic remarks at me.

But as long as I have complete understanding of my own self - something I strive everyday to achieving - than there is no need to care or worry about what others may think of me.

Even if those others... are my own parents.

This Place.

Hello. Thank you for being here. I am thankful to know that if someone, or anyone at all has even one second to read what I have to say here, then I am grateful someone understands what I am saying. Even if you don't.

I don't know you, and I most likely I may never know you. But that's okay.

I fully believe that whoever you are, you must be unique, talented, and amazing.
Even if you don't believe you are.

But that's okay. Because though I am still young, I have learned to accept people for who they are.
I have also learned that anyone and everyone has something special about themselves.
Even if you don't believe you do.

This place... a small droplet of water in an infinite pool of water is a place I hope to call my own. And Nobody can tell me what to write or what not to write. I am unbounded and I can tell the whole world my feelings without them having to ever met me.

That's the beauty of the internet, but most importantly there is the beauty in exploring myself in ways that I could never possibly do when I am out in the real world and away from my little place.

I'm not writing this just for myself. I am also writing my thoughts and feelings here so maybe someone who the same viewpoint as me can relate to what I write.

My favorite rapper is Eminem because he is very genuine with himself in his music. He said once "music is a self reflection" but I believe music and all forms of poetry and literature can be a self reflection of oneself.

I might be crazy. I might be out of the norm, odd, different, complex, in-over-my-head, and even stupid.

But at the end of the day when I close my eyes and fall asleep. At least I'll be happy knowing that there is a place on the internet where I can be anything I want to be, and do anything I want.

And I hope That Place is here.